Butterfly Bayou Page 9
Not that she’d brought much with her.
“I didn’t see a reason to wait. I don’t like to sit around. You know, I’m not normally this woman. I don’t flip out. I’m a trauma nurse and I freaked out over a dog.” She took a long breath and crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m sorry to have woken you, Sheriff.”
“Armie, please.”
“I thought you liked ‘Sheriff’ when you’re working.”
“I’m off the clock. Hence the lack of a uniform.”
She flushed a pretty pink. “That makes it worse. I got you out of bed to deal with my irrational fears.”
“They’re not irrational. It’s a new place and you’re from the city. The bayou can be daunting at first.”
She sank down to one of the four chairs around the small round kitchen table. “Oh, trust me, the panic I felt was irrational, and worse, it’s absolutely not who I want to be. I’m very sorry I got you out of bed. I’ll be all right now. The dog can stay here with me until I figure something out.”
It did not surprise him at all that she would be hard on herself. He sat down at the small kitchen table. It was covered with a plastic tablecloth that looked like it had been there since the seventies. It was definitely not the kind of décor he saw her using, but then, he was having a hard time seeing her in this house at all. There was an air of neglect that clung to the place, and she wasn’t a woman who neglected things. It took her a moment, but she found a small bowl and filled it with water.
“We have a vet but his office is about thirty minutes away. He runs a small shelter.” He watched her as she managed to find a can opener. He would offer to do it all for her, but she needed control. It had been stripped from her by fear, and she needed to get it back. He could understand that. “He can help you rehome the boy. You should do that soon or you know what will happen.”
She frowned and scooped a couple of spoonfuls of the wet food into a separate bowl. “I can’t have a dog. I work long hours.”
She got to one knee and Peanut was right there. His tail was wagging like crazy as he wolfed down those bites and looked back up to her for more.
“You also work in a place where no one will question you having a dog at the office.” He didn’t hate the idea of Peanut staying with her. He might not be much of a guard dog, but he was big enough to scare off people who didn’t know how easily he could be manipulated by beef jerky. “I think he’s still hungry.”
She gave the pup a pat on the head. “He’s been starving. I can see his ribs. I’ve got to go slow or he’ll make himself sick. He can have a bit more in an hour or so. The good news is he seems to have managed to not get fleas. I bet his owner kept him up to date on his medications.”
“I’m pretty sure the neighbors helped Bill out. Angie or Seraphina would come out here a couple of times a week to see if Bill needed anything. Roxanne had dinner with him at least once a week and I tried to make sure someone could drive him to his appointments.”
“So he wasn’t all alone?” she asked, her voice turning wistful. “I wondered how hard it was for him to have his kids and his wife gone. I wondered how it felt to be the last one of his family. I know his kids weren’t dead, but I don’t think they called or spent much time with him.”
“I think it was like a lot of families, especially ones from around here. The boys grew up and left town. They married and now they’re caught up in their own families. Between the miles and responsibilities, they didn’t get down here much. I think Bill spent Christmas with his oldest last year. Don’t think too unkindly of them. It can be hard to have so much distance.”
“I can think a lot of things about those kids. Men. They’re men now. And fathers,” she said with a frustrated sigh. “They should know better. That was one of the hardest parts of my job, having to tell a patient no one is coming for them.”
Peanut finally gave up, seeming to understand that pitiful doggy eyes weren’t going to move the new girl. He walked through the kitchen, sniffing and reacquainting himself with the home he’d always known. Lila moved to the table and sank down into the chair closest to him.
“You won’t have that problem here.” There were some good things about living in a small town. “If you have a patient who needs something, all you have to do is call me. I’ll make arrangements. Someone will be up there.”
“Because you’re a family?”
“We misfits have to stick together,” he said. “Are you feeling better now? More settled?”
She nodded. “I’m fine. Like I said, this is not who I normally am. Normally I would have gotten a baseball bat and charged in. I’m more used to being angry than afraid, but since . . .”
She trailed off and her whole body tightened up again.
He needed to let her know she wasn’t alone in this. “I still have nightmares about the night I got shot. I’ve been doing this job for a long time. I worked as a police officer in New Orleans for years and managed to not get myself shot, but last year I took a bullet right here in Papillon. It was funny because at the time I powered through. I mean it. I barely felt that sucker. I did my job and took down the criminals and everyone talked about what a badass I am. I don’t believe they would think the same about me if they knew how often I wake up in a cold sweat.”
Her eyes wouldn’t quite meet his. “I do understand that. And you’re wrong. They would still think you’re a badass.”
He let the words sit for a moment. If they were going to have any shot at being even friends, they had to get this out of the way. “You don’t like me knowing what happened to you. I’m sorry. I was curious. I didn’t mean to invade your privacy.”
Her eyes glanced away. “It made you think differently of me.”
“Why would you say that?”
She shook her head. “No reason. I’m sorry. I’m tired.”
When she started to stand, he reached out and put his hand on hers. “Lila, I ran over here as fast as I could. I damn near broke my legs trying to get to you. Finding out you survived a man killing your friend and himself in front of you didn’t make me less interested. It made me think about the fact that maybe you don’t need the additional pressure of having a man sniffing around you.”
She stood there for a moment, not taking her hand from his but also not twisting it around so she could hold it. “That’s not what my sister thinks. She thinks I need a man or I’m going to lose my business.”
She sank back down and eased her hand out of his, but her eyes had come back up. It was obvious she wasn’t talking about what she needed to talk about. Or maybe she simply didn’t want to talk to him about it. The upside? She wasn’t kicking him out, and at least she was talking to him about something.
“They’ll settle down. I know today was hard, and Doc didn’t make it easy. I’m going to talk to him about that. He needs to get out and talk to people, make them comfortable with you.” If he could get the man off that boat of his. “They’ll get to know you and things will be normal in no time at all.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“So we’re talking a couple of weeks? Because I’m on the razor’s edge financially according to those books.”
He waved that off. “I’ll talk to Rene for you. He’ll write you a check to keep the clinic going.”
“Does this Rene guy know the town uses him like a checkbook?” She shook her head. “I don’t want to merely keep the place open for emergencies. I want to practice here. I can’t do that if I don’t have patients. I’m uncertain Doctor Hamet has any intention of helping me past cashing the check I wrote him, so I have to consider my sister’s advice.”
“What did Lisa tell you to do?” Armie asked.
“She thinks I should do what worked for her. She said I should go to this Rene guy and ask him to fake date me because if people think I’m interested in one of the town’s guys, that will
somehow prove I’m interested in them. Like spending every dime I have on a clinic that helps them and working my ass off isn’t proof. Nope, I need to prove my loyalty by humping one of the guys. It’s typical when you think about it.”
He didn’t see anything at all typical about that, and he was going to have a talk with her sister. “You are not going to prostitute yourself for that clinic.”
“I was going to fake prostitute myself,” she corrected. “And I wasn’t going to fake sleep with anyone. It’s going to be a very old-fashioned fake courtship.”
“That’s the most ridiculous idea I ever heard.”
“I said the same thing,” she agreed. “So you want to do it?”
“What?”
“Fake date me so people will think I’m one of them. Remy thought it should be you and since you already kind of asked me out, it might not be the worst idea. You said you were willing to show me around. Maybe I should wait and see, but I don’t want to waste time. I can’t have too many more days like today. I know I’m supposed to be patient, but that’s not my strong suit. Maybe it’s because it’s late, but the whole fake-dating thing is starting to look like a viable option. We could make a schedule for a week or two and then reevaluate as to whether or not the plan is working.”
Fake date her? Make a schedule?
Of course, fake dating could lead to real dating. It might be a way to get to know her. Or it might be a complete disaster. It was ridiculous because there was a perfectly fine solution sitting right in front of them.
“Absolutely not. You’re not going to pull a fast one on this town. I know they seem like country bumpkins, but these are smart people. They would figure it out. The reason it worked for Lisa was because it was real. She was madly in love with Remy and everyone knew it.”
Her shoulders had straightened and she stood up again. “Understood. Thank you for coming to my rescue, Sheriff. You should get back. I will try to keep my 911 calls to a minimum.”
He stayed exactly where he was. “Or you could actually date me. I have zero interest in playing games, Lila. I’m too old for that. I’m going to be open and honest. I’m very attracted to you. I don’t normally think about women I haven’t talked to, but I’ve been thinking about you ever since I saw you at Remy and Lisa’s wedding. I thought you were beautiful and remote and mysterious. I became a cop because I like a good mystery, and that’s what you are to me.”
“I’m not a mystery. You know what happened to me.”
“There’s more to you than one incident.”
“I don’t know. I think it summed me up nicely.” She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about that, Armie. I think you should go.”
“And I think I should stay,” he replied. “Tell me you won’t sleep better if I’m on your couch.”
“You don’t have to sleep on the couch. I’ll be fine.”
Ah, but she’d said the magic words. He didn’t have to. Not he couldn’t. He shrugged out of his jacket. “Go back to bed. I’m going to secure the house and I’ll be out here on the couch.”
“What about Noelle?” she asked.
Noelle was asleep and wouldn’t even know he’d left the house unless she woke up and got his text. “She’s fine. She can get around and I’ve got my radio on me. She keeps hers on at her bedside. We live next to your in-laws. Delphine, Sera, and Zep will all help out if she needs something. Go to bed, Lila.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
She groaned. “I don’t want to be this person.”
“The person who needs help every now and then?”
“Yes. That person.” She wrinkled her nose his way and sighed. “I’ll get you some sheets.”
She walked away and Peanut was staring at the empty dish again.
“Yeah, buddy, neither one of us is getting everything he wants tonight.” Maybe he should have taken her up on the fake-date thing, but that wasn’t what she needed. She needed to really fit in, not make some kooky plan to trick people.
Although kooky plans were pretty much the only plans people made in Papillon.
Peanut wandered into the living room, like he was looking for something. Bill, more than likely.
Armie followed, kicking off his sneakers while Peanut managed to jump up onto the lounger that had been Bill’s favorite chair. The dog huffed as he settled in.
“His whole life changed in an instant and he doesn’t understand why or how.” Lila had a set of sheets in her hands.
That had happened to more than the dog.
“Sometimes all you can do is get through a day.” He took the sheet from her and spread it over the couch. “One foot in front of the other.”
“Just keep swimming. It’s funny. I have a couple of nephews and they like that movie. I was babysitting one night. I liked holding the babies. After what happened, holding John or Brendon was one of the only ways I could calm down. I watched that movie about a hundred times. I was treading water in Dallas. I wasn’t swimming. I need to swim, Armie.”
He understood what she was saying. He’d been there.
“And you will. You have to be patient.” He stood in front of her, letting his hands find her shoulders. She hadn’t kicked him out. It was enough for tonight.
She turned those gorgeous eyes up to meet his own. “You won’t change your mind? About the pretending-to-date-me thing?”
“I want you to think about actually dating me.” He rather thought she was a woman who would appreciate honesty. “I’m not a good bet. I’m forty. I wasn’t the best husband the first time. I was a workaholic, and being a cop in the big city sometimes made me difficult to be around. I have a daughter who needs me and might always need me. My current job doesn’t pay well, and I’ll likely stay in this crazy-ass town for the rest of my life. But I would like to date you. I would like to see if there’s anything between us because I felt something the first time I saw you. I felt it again yesterday, and I feel it right now. I’m tired of logic. I’m tired of responsibility. I want one thing for myself.”
Her eyes met his and he could see her soften. “You want me for yourself?”
“I want to see if you could be the thing in my life that makes me feel young again. That’s how I feel around you. Young. Dumb. Oddly hopeful. Maybe it’s a trick of my mind. Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but if it’s not, I don’t want to look back and not have tried.”
“You don’t know me.”
He invaded her space a bit. “But I want to and not because you’re worried the town won’t like you. They’ll turn around. I’ll talk to some influential people and fix this problem for you. Whether or not you ever want to date me.”
She didn’t move away. “Real date you.”
Something real. That was absolutely what he wanted, what he was ready for. “Real dates. Real other stuff if the real dates go well.”
She bit her bottom lip as though considering the problem. “We could just do the other stuff. You want to lay all the cards on the table? I find you very attractive and I wouldn’t mind some stress relief. I haven’t had a sexual partner in over a year.”
Wouldn’t that be easy for her? “Does the incredibly smart doctor not want to spend too much time with the blue-collar guy?”
She frowned at him. “I’m a nurse practitioner and I don’t have problems with blue-collar guys. I grew up poor. I think the incredibly sexy sheriff will figure out I’m stubborn and difficult and not likely to change. I thought I should get some sex out of it before he realizes he’s not going to like me.”
His whole body heated up. Oh, nothing was going to happen because he wasn’t about to let the gorgeous big-city lady use him for sex, but his hopes had shot way up. “I think you’re going to have to risk that.”
Her chin came up, a stubborn glint hitting her eyes. “And if I don’t want to take the risk?”
“You want me to kiss you?”
“More than I want my next breath.”
“I’m not very . . .” She huffed and seemed to come to a decision. “All right.”
* * *
• • •
She’d been ready to explain to him that she wasn’t all that great at the sex stuff. But damn it, she could learn. All of her life she’d had to study. She wasn’t as smart as the rest of her siblings. They seemed to breeze through school, but she’d had to buckle down and really study to get the same good grades they took for granted.
She might not be good at sex, but she could change that. She could study and practice.
Was she about to kiss Armie LaVigne? Just the day before she’d kind of wanted to smash his handsome face. Except she really hadn’t. Even when the man had given her a ticket, she’d wanted to know how it felt to have those sensual lips on hers. He was right. There was something between them, something she’d never felt before with any man.
Chemistry.
She’d kind of thought that was a myth, something women told other women to explain their utterly illogical attractions. Nope. Here it was, tugging at her every instinct, drugging her good sense.
She moved into his space. He was wearing plaid pajama pants and a plain white T-shirt. He shouldn’t look sexy, but he did.
Was she supposed to go up on her toes to kiss him? Or wait for him to make a move? What was she doing? She didn’t need this entanglement.
Brave. She’d come to Papillon to change her life, to be a new Lila Daley. The old Lila would never have brazenly kissed a man she barely knew. Of course, the old Lila also wouldn’t have called 911 and spent the majority of the evening in a corner being afraid of a dog who was now sleeping in her chair, but she was going with it.
His way-too-gorgeous-for-a-man’s lips curled up as she put her hands on his shoulders. The move might have been awkward, but that was where the discomfort ended. His hands found her hips and a flash of heat went through her.